


It's not about blood, it's about control

by princesssroyalpinkpanties



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode Fix-it, Gen, Post-Episode: s12e04 American Nightmare, Sam Winchester on Demon Blood, kind of his memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-29 00:30:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8468860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princesssroyalpinkpanties/pseuds/princesssroyalpinkpanties
Summary: Sam always did his best to not think about his powers and the possibility of having them, again, until he met Magda and had to help her gain control over her own.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I REALLY LOVED 12x04 and I'm so happy about all the parallels between Sam and Magda and their powers. But the ending could've gone different, in my opinion. This is something to settle all my boyking!Sam feelings and how I missed them. Enjoy, xx.

Sam got the call just a couple of days after they left the case. He and Dean were in a truck stop, somewhere in Missouri, to get some grub and a few hours of sleep before heading home to the bunker. Sam was half asleep on the back seat of the impala, visions of blood dripping and fire starting to make his way out of his subconscious, when the phone rang.

"Sam." Her voice was shaky and scared. Sam took a while to realize who was.

"Magda?" He asks, awaken. Dean was blacked out on the front seat, too tired to wake up to the sound.

"I need your help, Sam. Something happened. A man tried to kill me, I don't know who he was but I killed him, Sam. I choked him with my mind." She breathes out the words and starts to cry. Sam's heart quickens.

"Okay, Magda I need you to calm down." Sam's already out of the car, whispering. "Here's what I want you to do: take the next bus to Lebanon, Kansas. I'll meet you there. You think you can do that?"

"Y-yes."

"Okay, then I'll see you in a few days, okay?"

They set a place of meeting and say goodbye. Sam's too awake to go back to sleep, so he waits until Dean's rested so they can take the road again. Memories of his past rushing through his mind, things he'd never thought he would feel again. Lately, he feels like he's living his past all over again.

* * *

 

When he finally sees Magda again, she tells him everything about what happened. She was at a bus stop, went to the bathroom and some guy with his face covered tried to shoot her. She panicked, her power taking over control, and she chocked the guy till his eyes turned into marbles and his face, purple. Sam listened to everything with an increasing fear, but also awe for how strong this girl was at such young age.

This girl has killed three people now, but he didn't see evil in her. Sam could relate to that.

They talked about her powers, the things she could do, things she had done; She could not only read minds, but also control them; something Sam never had the power to do. But she couldn't do this to Sam, he realized, a little bit proud, when he asked her to try. He still got _some_ of his mojo.

"You'll need to learn how to not let your powers take over your body like that. Even in situations where they're needed. You have to be conscious of everything you do, understand me?" He explains. "Took me a long time to learn that, and a lot of people got hurt in the process. I don't want the same thing to happen to you."

"How?" She looked at him like a pupil waiting for her master's instructions. Sam couldn't deny, he liked it.

He searched his mind for the tricks he learned with Ruby, but when they come out, it's like they've never been forgotten. He closed his eyes, remembering.

"You need to open your mind, let it wrap around this thing inside it. Close your eyes, you can feel it, right? You need to shape your mind, your thoughts, so that you can access that part of your mind when you _want to_. C'mon, try it."

She did. Eyes closed, expression like she was trying to remember something really obvious, at the tip of her tongue, but couldn't remember. Exploring her own mind and its capacity.

She reminded him so much of himself. Sam couldn't stop but think about when he was the pupil, controlled by his grief and need for revenge for the loss of his brother; when he couldn't control his mind, because he couldn't control himself and all the innocent people whose lives he could've saved ended up dead because of this.

When Dean came back from hell, Sam was getting stronger by day. By the time he could kill demons with his mind, he was already lost, but he can't help thinking about everything he could've done, all the people he could've helped, if his mind were in the right place. Maybe, if he got his powers back, they could even find a new way of defeating Lucifer. _Maybe..._

He pushes back the thoughts, like he's been doing it since they stopped the Apocalypse. Since he got purified by the trials and thought the powers were gone for good with, hopefully, the demon blood. He couldn't stand being called a freak and a monster one more time, especially since he and Dean finally found some peace in their relationship. Maybe, this time, he could understand Sam, could be by his side and keeping him from falling from the edge. But no. No way.

He helped her find the right state of mind, find the source of her power inside herself, helped her to control it. She was a quick learner and Sam was impressed, his heart full of hope that maybe she wouldn't have to go through more tragedy than she's already been through.

When they saiy goodbye again, Sam can trust Magda will be fine. She could take care of herself, but he assured her she should call him anytime, anyways.  He bought Dean some pie, because he knew his brother was waiting, and went back to the car.

Sam was feeling something he thought he didn't knew the meaning anymore. He was... Proud? And proud is some kind of power.

He tried.

The keys moved in his hand.

Just a little. But enough.

He felt his blood rush inside his veins, the way it moved with every beat of his heart. It felt so good, he was in control of his own body for what it felt like ages.

He smirked, happy, and started the car. His brother was waiting for him.


End file.
